I've taken a five month break from writing this blog, and I know it's very possible that any reader's I had at first have gone by the wayside. This is understandable. Why read what is essentially a serial publication if the publication quits having entries?
But for anyone still listening out there, I believe I owe you an explanation. Five months ago, at the beginning of November, my little sister took her own life.
I won't go into too much detail, but suffice it to say, as in the case of many suicides, there was no note. No explanation. One day she was there and one day she was gone. So, after many months of grief counseling, spending time with family, and just trying to keep breathing, I'm finally back up to writing.
But although writing hasn't been my constant companion of late, reading has been a long time friend. It's what I go back to during the sharp and hard parts of life. It helps me make sense of things.
So here are a few books I read during my hiatus.
Healing your holiday grief : 100 practical ideas for blending mourning and celebration during the holiday season by Alan D. Wolfelt PhD
Okay, I'll be honest, this is not a riveting work of literature. It's set out bullet point style and has a lot of suggestions that would seem basic common sense. "Remember to Keep Eating" or "Take time for yourself alone." But the simplicity of the layout allows deeper things to get through like the idea that some guilt is going to seep through as part of the normal grieving process, and it is okay to set boundaries to holiday interactions-up to and including not attending. Since the holidays happened directly after my sister's passing, this book recommendation from a colleague was a life saver.
You can't touch my hair : and other things I still have to explain by Phoebe Robinson
I don't think I have to explain how essential humor is during times of grief. We've all had those really bad days that can too soon turn into really bad weeks. I listened to this book, read by the author, in Overdrive. The smart, on the nose, and often geeky humor of Miss Robinson's memoir got me through some really dark days.
Hell House by Richard Matheson
I think when we hurt as humans, it's natural to go back to the things that make us feel safe. Weird as it may sound, for me that is the horror genre. I grew up with parents who worked late hours, and some of the only times I got to spend with my mom at points were cuddled up on the couch watching Alfred Hitchcock Presents. I love Stephen King and have been making an effort to branch out. But recently, I was in the mood for a good old fashioned ghost story.
Call it a seeking of the unknown or a re-examining of my Agnostic spiritual beliefs, I wanted to read something that examined different aspects of the paranormal. This story is about an expedition to a notorious haunted house by a somewhat skeptical paranormal physicist accompanied by spiritualists and psychics. It's a classic, with good reason. Come prepared for crude language, sexual content, and plenty of jump scares.
The Bell Jar by Silvia Plath
I'll be honest, this is another one I didn't make it all the way through. I thought that it would be a timely classic read, but it turned out to be too sad. Still, I may try again someday down the road. Plath is a beautiful writer.
Going forward, I will try to update more frequently now that I've got my writing groove back. I still need to finish Half-Resurrection Blues by Daniel José Older and report back. In the meantime, I urge anyone dealing with depression or suicidal thoughts, or with family members dealing with these feelings to visit website for Project Semicolon.
And for anyone who needs it.
